The Difference of Ten Years

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What a difference ten years make for a mother.

My brother and his wife just had their first baby and I was asked to be the godmother. I was so honored and happy to have been asked and realize that I have  big shoes to wear.  The Godparent is such an important role in a child’s life.  As a Godparent, I am to help nurture the baby’s Christian faith, guide her as she grows up, and later serve as mentor to her.

 

I am taking on this role with every intent to do the best that I can even though I am still trying to figure myself out as a woman and a mother.   I am thrilled for my brother and his wife.  To see him in this new role, as a father, makes my heart warm.  Putting together baby strollers, playpens, and gliders;  emptying the Diaper Champ; putting the baby down for her nap.  Not to mention, walking around looking tired like most new dads.

And my sister-in-law, she is doing a fantastic job as a new mom.  Naturally my SIL is excited, worried, thrilled, overjoyed, and overwhelmed – all that the same time.  We speak often, sometimes weekly, even daily.  Like most new moms, she has questions about pregnancy, motherhood, breastfeeding, and the gross stuff no one warned any of us about.

As the godmother/madrina and the aunt/tia, I want to make sure I give the best advice possible.   Mostly I rely on my experiences of what worked/didn’t work compared to what I read/found out when I had my first baby ten years ago.

I was so young when my first baby was born.  It’s astonishing, really, that at age 24 I had a brand new baby. I was just a baby myself. Yet I thought that  23 was the perfect age for marriage and 24 just the right age to start a family.   Forget that I was recently married or in my last year of law school. Little did I know how difficult life would be with a baby and a husband at home.

Not only was I young, but none of my friends had babies yet.  I didn’t have anyone to share stories with, ask questions to, or go on play dates with. In fact, what was a play date? My friends were busy planning dates with men, not children. I relied on my pile of baby books, my mom, and mother-in-law for advice. Course, it was no surprise that all three of my trusty sources gave me totally different advice. Yet somehow, I figured it out- at least I think.

Now, ten years later, as my older brother’s first baby turns just four and half months old, I am on the other end of this conversation. I am giving the advice.  Most of the time I sum up what I learned, what worked for me, then end with you know your baby best.  Hard to remember what I did, five, six, and ten years ago.   I made it through the infant stage, the toddler, and kid phase. Hopefully I’ll make it through the tween stage.

This week my son turns ten and I’m on the hunt for advice.  This phase is also new for me.  Things are different, he’s different.  Thankfully this time around, I have a few friends with tweens that I can call to for advice.   But as I told my SIL this weekend, this new stage will get easier and it  will also get harder.

The best advice I can give them is to cherish the time and enjoy the ride.    Before they know it, they  will be celebrating my niece’s tenth birthday with a whole new set of challenges. 

 

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